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  • 情書大全

    搞笑情書范文

    分類:搞笑情書瀏覽:14005
    親愛的儀琳小師妹:

      收到這封信是不是很突兀?按說應該叫你掌門師妹,但俺覺得還是叫小師妹親切。

      小師妹心地善良,純凈無私,貌美如花。俺早就對你垂涎三尺,只可恨老金活生生地將我們拆散,棒打鴛鴦兩紛飛。

      俺真的不明白,舊社會黑是黑了點,暗是有些暗,但大男人三妻四妾實屬正常,恐怕老金極端缺乏歷史常識,非讓俺單戀一枝花,這點從他讓俺出場的時代背景之模糊可見一斑。

      說實話,俺對你佩服得無體投地,俺借你的口登上了歷史舞臺,而且栩栩如生,活靈活現,比起什么老黃生搬硬套讓俺一上場就和盈盈演對手戲強多了。那時你只有16歲,俺卻已經26了,但年齡不是問題,只是你是個尼姑,不太好辦!所以在那個月黑風高的床上,俺強忍欲火,裝出一副柳下惠的樣子,后來,你抱俺奔跑的時候,俺癡癡地盯著你看,險些暴露……

      后來俺見了你爸,那叫一個爽,既然他都可以不守規矩,俺也可以放縱一把。你雖然頭皮光些,但可省去做什么“離子”的開銷,而且手感較好,可以作為一種標志,即使黑燈瞎火也不致于搞錯,哈哈!

      哦!俺和小師妹靈珊?她是俺從光著屁股看著長大的,早就沒什么新鮮感了,不過你也知道,俺們學武之人,長期困守山林,師兄弟中女人又少,本就沒什么可挑挑揀揀的。后來她跟了小林子,俺面子無光,眼見借她當掌門人無望,就讓她那個偽君子的父親給俺炒了魷魚。

      跟盈盈更不用提了,她讓俺害怕,實在是又敬又畏,真象個婆婆似的。不過她比你大了二歲,在江湖上見的世面又廣,心有城府,一步步給俺下套。其實她知道俺命不長久,想到少林寺去玩又沒借口,才演了一出送郎求醫的大戲。正象她說:俺帶江湖群豪大鬧少林,給足了她面子,她就死也滿足了。

      不過想讓俺為誰一而再,再而三的死的人,就只你一個了!當初田伯光要殺你,俺要代你而死;在福建遭遇埋伏,俺也是要用生命去保護你;在客棧你們被嵩山派迷倒,俺第一個解救的又是你……可恨莫大、沖虛些老兒看俺看得緊,俺不得不收起浮行浪子的野心,去裝什么正人君子,那段日子真的把俺害苦了!

      在恒山,俺正想與你長相廝守,不料那盈盈派了數百耳目上山,弄得俺一點機會也沒有。好不容易平定了江湖風波,卻和盈盈有了三年之約!俺到三張才嘗到女人的滋味,再不搞點婚外戀之類的,這人生還有什么意義呢?

      今日斗膽給你寫這封情書,告訴你俺的心事,俺真正喜歡的--是你!如果你還對俺色心不死的話,晚上后山見!阿彌佗佛~~


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